It’s been some time since I last wrote a post… It’s not because I don’t and haven’t had anything to say – it’s just that there is so, so much to say and I’ve been having trouble putting it together or sorting it out and getting it coherent!
Life has been so crazy over these past months… life changing actually. Or as a friend of my friend told me… “I’m living life.” And for me, several of the things I am about to embark on are way “out of the box” for me…
These past few months I have been feeling out of sorts, antsy, melancholy, lonesome, lonely and not knowing how to move from that to some thing that is a direct opposite… I’ve tried journaling, painting… anything that did not involve popping a pill to make me or it better and go away… And stop doing things like riding my bike.
In the neighborhood in which I live, we have these incredible, huge birds… Sand Hill Cranes! They mate for life, and their young stay with the parents till the following spring when they eventually mate themselves. There is a sole, lone Crane in the neighborhood populated with 3 families, and he/she wanders the empty lots, flies away when approached and always stays by itself… And, I wonder how or why this has happened to such a beautiful, familial and social bird…
About a month ago, while in my family room feeling sorry for myself, I heard this huge, high pitched, sorrowful sound – almost like crying. I ran outside in my pool cage and saw my lone Sand Hill Crane, on top on a hill of sand, its head reaching for the sky, and just screeching – wailing its heart out – not the usual cawing sound one hears from these beautiful creatures. The sound I know carried for a great distance because it was that loud and piercing! And I began to weep. It made me so sad…
I realized, later not then, that the poor creature may not be able to change its status, though I still wonder how it could have happened! But, I do now realize that I can change my sense of loneliness… I’m working on getting myself out of the box!
Pingback: Part Deux – I’m Not Finished « A Pinch of This & A Dash of That